If your idea of unwinding is curling up with a true crime podcast or another serial killer documentary, experts say you might not be relaxing at all — you might be reliving stress.
Psychologist Dr. Thelma Tenni, who specializes in trauma and family therapy, warns that being “soothed” by violent stories is often a sign of unresolved trauma. “If your version of peace is three episodes of Law & Order before bed,” she said, “ask yourself — why does trauma feel relaxing to me?”
According to Dr. Tenni, many people who grew up in high-stress or chaotic homes unconsciously seek that same energy as adults. “Some of us mistake peace for boredom,” she explained. “But peace isn’t boring — it’s just unfamiliar.”
Her viral message has struck a deep chord online. One viewer wrote, “I grew up in an abusive home. I can’t fall asleep unless ID TV is on.” Another admitted, “Once I started healing, I couldn’t stand those shows anymore. They used to feel comforting — now they feel disturbing.”
Still, others believe they’re drawn to justice, not trauma. “I watch to see the bad guy caught,” one woman said. “It helps me believe the world can be fair.”
Dr. Tenni gently reminds her followers that healing means learning to feel safe in calm moments. “Lean into the quiet,” she said. “Your body may not recognize it yet, but you deserve peace.”
Maybe it’s time to trade the murder mysteries for a moment of true rest.
