At 15, overwhelmed by her parents’ divorce and believing she was unwanted, Tamara Laroux made a tragic decision that nearly ended her life. Now 54, she openly shares what she experienced during those moments, which she believes revealed both the reality of suffering and the presence of God.

Tamara recalled taking her mother’s gun and, in despair, turning it on herself. She immediately felt her body shutting down and described losing her sight and hearing. She then felt as if she were moving rapidly away from her physical body.

What followed, she said, was a deep sense of isolation and panic. She found herself in a place she interpreted as hell, surrounded by countless others who appeared to be in emotional and spiritual anguish. She described the environment as terrifying and overwhelming.

In the midst of this, Tamara said she suddenly felt lifted out of the darkness by a brilliant light. She interpreted this as God intervening and bringing her into a peaceful, beautiful place she believes was heaven. She described vivid colors, an overwhelming sense of calm, and a feeling of being completely known and loved.

Moments later, she felt herself return to her body. Doctors later told her the bullet had narrowly missed her heart.

Tamara has since written about her experience and now works in ministry. She says her goal is to help others who feel hopeless, sharing her story as evidence that healing and purpose are still possible—even after the darkest moments.