Mark Harmon’s first date with Pam Dawber began with a straightforward approach. A mutual friend suggested a group date, but Harmon preferred to call her directly. “I said, ‘Can I just call? Can I get a number and just cold call?’ And so I did,” Harmon recalls. He left a message suggesting a coffee date, and Dawber picked up. They went out that night and have been together ever since, marrying exactly one year later.

Their relationship started shortly after Harmon was named PEOPLE’s Sexiest Man Alive in 1986. Despite his fame, Harmon valued lasting relationships. “I’m real monogamous by nature, and I’m fine being alone like I am now,” he said then. The couple has two sons: Sean, an actor, and Ty, a screenwriter. “I’m proud of our boys,” says Harmon. “They understand the work ethic and they’re very different.”

When asked about the secret to their long-lasting marriage, Harmon simply says, “I have no secret. We laugh. You got to laugh, and you got to talk and communicate.” He attributes their success to luck and finding the right person.

Harmon chose to play Special Agent Gibbs on NCIS partly to spend more time with his family. “It was important to be able to make pancakes on Saturday morning,” he says. Reflecting on his career and family life, Harmon expresses gratitude: “I’m so fortunate. I don’t ever wake up not thinking that.”